Christen Clark: Partnering with Parents

Watch or listen to the podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts or YouTube.

In this episode, Jeremy sits down with Christen Clark (host of the Collide Kids Podcast and Seven Minute Devotions for Busy Parents) to talk about what real partnership with parents actually looks like in kids ministry. You’ll hear why encouragement matters more than information, what parents are truly looking for right now, and how to build simple, sustainable rhythms that help families grow spiritually without feeling overwhelmed.

Plus, Christen shares super practical ways kids ministry leaders can support parents through social media, parent emails, and easy “next steps” that actually work.

If you want to pastor families better and make your kids ministry more effective long-term, this one’s for you.

Quick Links:

⁠KIDMIN U⁠ (Next session starts in February)

Transcript:

KIDMIN U Team (00:00)

Well, hey, Kristen, welcome to the podcast.

Christen Clark (00:02)

Thank you, Jeremy. This is awesome. So glad to be here.

KIDMIN U Team (00:05)

Yeah. Okay. So a lot of people probably know you from the podcast that you run in a second. I want you to tell us about that, but I'm curious, what is it like on the other end? I asked Lauren Jackson this on the kids mystery circle. You guys are pros at interviewing other people. What's it like to actually have the tables turned and people asking you questions for a change.

Christen Clark (00:25)

Yes. Well, I love being on podcasts because I feel like some of the pressure is off to like come up with questions, but I also am nervous that I'm going to just take over and start asking you questions. So if that happens, just roll with it.

KIDMIN U Team (00:34)

⁓

no, this is like a 50 50 partnership. I'm totally okay. If you have questions, we'll roll with it. I just love a good conversation wherever it leads. Well, maybe tell us about that. What are what are some of the things that you got going on? ⁓ The podcast that you have? That's how I discovered you. But maybe for people who haven't heard, share a little bit about what you're up to.

Christen Clark (00:56)

Yeah, thank you. So I started the Collide Kids podcast in 2020. ⁓ It's a show for kids and families to listen to together. ⁓ So just something fun. I want to expose families to great resources and resource providers. ⁓ I really miss like the Family Christian bookstore and like the Lifeway, but like we don't have those anymore. I'm so sad. And so a lot of times it's hard to figure out what's good and what's out there. And so I wanted to use my show to kind of

platform some people that are producing great stuff that might not be with a major publisher. I also love interviewing people about their job. So a lot of the people I get to talk with, they might have books or resources. And then a lot of people are just normal and they just have like regular jobs, but they use their job to, to serve other people and to glorify God and whatever they're doing. So I've interviewed Olympic athletes, community helpers, I did a firefighter interview to

I've interviewed a veterinarian. I've talked with musicians. ⁓ I even got to interview an astronaut, which was really cool. So just all these different people and how the thing that they're kind of quirky about and interested in when they were a kid, now they're using that to help other people and to serve God. And so it's just a really cool way for me to convey this important message I think kids need to hear is that you were created by God for a purpose.

And the things that are strange or funky or different about you are actually God's design. And so just being able to hear that in different people's story is so fun for me. So I really enjoy it. ⁓ And then I also started just a couple of months ago a podcast just for kids, sorry, just for parents called the Seven Minute Devotions for Busy Parents. So it comes out twice a week and it's just seven minute devotional, just a quick, you know, Bible verse and devotional thought from me.

KIDMIN U Team (02:43)

Cool.

Christen Clark (02:51)

It's just whatever God's laying on my heart. Right now we're just going through the character of God and learning who God is because I think before we discover anything about ourself, we need to know who created us. And so just learning different things about Him and it's been really fun. I've really enjoyed it.

KIDMIN U Team (03:06)

I love that you're there's so many things I love about your answer. But actually, when you're talking about teaching on the character of God, that like tugs at my heart a little bit. ⁓ A lot of people don't know this because I haven't shared publicly, like about some of these things. But that's a huge part of like how I've led kids ministry and even some things I will be creating here over the next year or so. Because I really believe that the way that we teach kids

Christen Clark (03:14)

Mm-hmm.

KIDMIN U Team (03:30)

should be centered around the character of God. I actually think a lot of the ways that we structure our curriculum is good, but maybe not complete. And, you know, when you start thinking about...

you know, application statements or main points or big ideas, whatever those things are, those are really good. But if they're not built on who God is, then they're it's almost like they're temporary answers. Like, that's kind of how I think about it. Like, if we want to teach kids how to think, then we've got to actually teach them the timeless truth that is God's character, because everything flows from that. You know, we could just teach specifics, but I feel like those specifics sometimes have an expiration date

Christen Clark (04:02)

Absolutely.

KIDMIN U Team (04:07)

I just feel like if we talk about one specific part of their life, here's what to do in this situation. And that's all we ever talk about. What happens when they grow up and that's not their struggle anymore. Now they have new challenges. So I just think the way that we teach, we should teach principles and the best way to do it is the character of God. So I love that you're starting there. think that's

Christen Clark (04:13)

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

KIDMIN U Team (04:27)

That's brilliant. Okay, so we see Kristen Clarke today doing all these amazing things. You've got the podcast, you've got these ministries, you're also a coach, you do lots of cool stuff there. What I love to do to start these shows is talk about your origin story.

Christen Clark (04:28)

Yeah.

KIDMIN U Team (04:43)

maybe take us back to the beginning and share how'd you get started in kids ministry and doing all these things.

Christen Clark (04:43)

Thank

Yeah. ⁓ Yeah, I love people's origin story too. That's my favorite. ⁓ Like I love the prequels, you know, when the movie comes out and then you get the story of how it all, yeah, I love that. That's so good. ⁓ So my prequel is not that exciting, but I was just a really bored teenager. ⁓ And I was not enjoying youth group at the time and just reached out to...

KIDMIN U Team (05:07)

Ha

Christen Clark (05:15)

I think I was in high school and I asked the middle school pastor if I could just start serving in middle school ministry and just helping out because I just didn't want to go to the big kids stuff. ⁓ And so I started serving in middle school ministry just as a volunteer. I led worship, I did some things there. ⁓ And then I also began ⁓ in the summers, I would work at a camp, a church camp in North Carolina and just fell in love with camp ministry, loved getting to hang out with people, loved getting to

meet new people every week. It was just so fun. ⁓ And really thought I was going to do something like that. And then I went to Liberty University and got a music education degree, but I always knew I wasn't going to be like a teacher in the classroom. I really felt this pull to ministry. And so I was chaperoning a ⁓ fun event. from North Carolina, but we were at a Braves game in Atlanta. And I just felt the Lord tug at my heart and say, you're supposed to live here.

and it was between ⁓ my sophomore and junior year of college. And so I thought, that's weird. So I didn't think anything of it for a while. And then God kept putting things in front of me to say, I needed to go to Atlanta. So I decided to sign up for a summer internship at a church here in Atlanta. And I was working with the women's ministry and the music ministry and the children, you know, what interns do, right? I did all the things.

and ended up working at that church for about eight years. So I never left. did get promoted from the internship though. I didn't stay as an intern for eight years. That would be horrible. No, that would be horrible. ⁓ But yeah, just through that, just really connected with the kids there, really discovered that like, sometimes I felt like the Pied Piper. I still feel like that too. Like kids will just come up to me. I have a pleasant face that they feel like they can talk to me and tell me jokes and stuff. Maybe it's the glasses.

KIDMIN U Team (06:49)

Didn't stay there, yeah. ⁓

Christen Clark (07:09)

But yeah, so I've just always connected with kids on a different level and really enjoyed that. I like to jump around and wave my arms when I sing. So that works better in kids ministry than it did in like the adult choir. So I did that for a while as kids worship and then ended up working in a few other churches as well. So I did children's ministry full time for about 20 years ⁓ and was just...

KIDMIN U Team (07:09)

Sure.

Christen Clark (07:36)

Yeah, it was awesome. I loved it so much. And so now I've stepped away ⁓ from full time ministry and I'm working with a number of churches, which is fun. And then I just get to attend church on Sunday and be just like a normal volunteer, which is strange if you've ever worked at church and then you step down to like just volunteering, you're like, do want me to like lock up at the end? Like I actually get to go home with everybody else. It's wild. But ⁓ yeah, so I've been, I've been ⁓

I've had lot of experiences in ministry, small church, big church, everything in between, and just really discovered that that was something that was in me that God had put in me that I didn't realize.

KIDMIN U Team (08:14)

Yeah, I relate to that because that's the season that I'm in. So I did kids ministry for like 14 years and up until a few months ago, like this is the first time where I'm not working at a church. Like I stepped out to go do things like this. And it's so weird when I go to church. I mean, we attended the same church I worked at. It's still our home church. And so to go to the same place where it's like, I know where like all the things are, you know, like I can go get those supplies if you need. Like I saw this thing break during service. Do you need a hand? And just look.

Learning to turn that off for a little bit. It's okay to just go to church. It's different and I feel guilty when I just head home after I attend. Sorry guys, I you were going to be here for another hour or so.

Christen Clark (08:47)

Yeah, that's hard.

No, me too! Me too!

Or I it's the oh, you should really do. Oh, never mind. Sorry. It's not mine. Oh, maybe you should. Never mind. Sorry. I have to like pull it back in like physically pull it back in, you know.

KIDMIN U Team (09:09)

Yeah.

Yeah, it's hard.

But anytime you're like leading something and then you become a participant, it is a total shift that you just got to be ready for. But it's been a fun adventure. Okay, so

Christen Clark (09:16)

Yes.

KIDMIN U Team (09:20)

So

you've been around for a long time. You've had over 20 years working in church. And what we really wanted to dig into today was this idea of how do we partner with parents? How do we pastor not just kids, but also their parents? Because when you reach a parent, you reach a whole family. If you could go back to Kristin in year one and give her one piece of advice about, what does it actually look like to partner with parents? What should you be focusing on? What would your advice be to Kristin and her

Christen Clark (09:30)

Mm-hmm.

KIDMIN U Team (09:50)

a year.

Christen Clark (09:52)

Wow, I think Kristen and her rookie year was very, she was involved in a lot, which honestly, that's what I'm doing now. So that makes sense. It's always been in me to do a lot of random things. I think it's really, partnering with parents is really about coming alongside them. And so sometimes we get the impression that we've got to give them everything. We've got to spoon feed all of this stuff. But if we're partnering with them, we're linking arms and we're...

carrying them along with us. And so that means we're doing some active listening and we're getting to know them and we're getting to know their kids and we're trying to help them to realize that they have a role in this discipleship calling. It's not just for the church to take care of, ⁓ but it's also not just for the parents to take care of. Like we need to equip them and do it with them and whether that's to give them an example or to set them up with mentors or disciple them in different ways. Our job is to really link arms with our

those parents. I think in that first year, ⁓ it's really easy to be like, let me tell you all the things you're doing wrong and how you can fix it, instead of really just listening and hearing where they are and where they're coming from and what they've been through. And that would help you really to understand how you can partner with them better.

KIDMIN U Team (10:56)

you

Yeah, I love it. Okay, so my question is this. What are parents actually looking for? You know, I know there are lot of things that we think are important and a lot of things that we may be default to as kids ministry leaders and, and think, okay, well, I'm, checking the box. But as you're getting to know real parents and you're, you're one of the people who's actually creating resources directly for them, which is great. What are they looking for? What do they need right now?

Christen Clark (11:27)

Mm-hmm.

I think they need encouragement. ⁓ And I don't just mean like flattery like cute shoes or hey, you're a great dad. I think they really need encouragement. Like the word encourage actually means to pour courage into something. So if we're giving them encouragement, we're giving them motivation and strength and the resources or just the validation that they need to know that they are exactly who they're supposed to be.

⁓ I don't know if you've ever been to Disney world, but one of my favorite things at the magic kingdom is the fireworks show at the end. ⁓ and they haven't changed it in years that I've been there, which I'm thankful for because my favorite part is when the, you know, it starts singing the lion King theme song and then Mufasa comes up and he says, remember who you are. And I get chills right now thinking about it. Like I've never wanted to put praise hands up during, ⁓ during Disney songs, but that one I do. like, yes.

Because we need to remember who we are. We are children of God. We are called. We have a purpose. If we're parents, we have been placed in our family for a purpose and we need to remember who we are and whose we are. so, ⁓ so remember what Mufasa said and remember who you are. So parents need that. ⁓ They don't need 12 steps to every this and that. They don't need thousands and thousands of books. They can barely read the emails we're sending them.

So we've really got to be intentional about how we're conveying content for them and making sure that that's building them up so that they recognize their purpose and their calling as parents. ⁓ They need to connect with us better on social media. They need to know that we're there for them in many different ways. And so, yeah, think for parents, it's really about that encouragement and connection.

KIDMIN U Team (13:19)

Yeah.

I love that you said that because I think we put a lot of pressure on telling parents what to do. Yeah, as if what they really need is like answers or another to do list, which is funny when we say that out loud, because for anybody who is a parent, you're like, hold on, I don't need another thing. I'm already drowning with the list that I have, you know, so I wonder what effect that has on a parent when you receive all that. And then maybe you even start thinking, man, I'm barely surviving. Now you're telling me there's all these other things I need to do if I'm to call myself a good parent.

Christen Clark (13:27)

Mm-hmm.

KIDMIN U Team (13:49)

It

might make them feel like they're failing in a way. But I wonder, like leaning into this encouragement thing, and what I hear you saying is really vision casting, like helping them understand, here's the vision for your role. I'm not just going to tell you another thing to do. You know, that reminds me, have ever heard of this term of like, the word should, like shoulding on people? Have you heard about that? Yeah.

Christen Clark (13:50)

Mm-hmm.

Right.

KIDMIN U Team (14:13)

I think we do that with parents, right? And just to be clear for anybody listening, I am not cursing. I'm not cursing when I say that. I'm using the word S-H-O-U-L-D. sometimes if you ever talk to that person who just tells you what you need to do all the time, we would say, they're shoulding on me. And sometimes that's what we do to parents. And I wonder if it just backfires, if it has maybe the opposite effect. And I wonder what would happen if we leaned

what you're talking about, which is, here's the beauty of your role. Here's the power and the wonder in it. I heard one person say that the most important pastor a child will ever have is a parent. how many parents know that? But what would shift if we did that? mean, as you've kind of, I imagine you've tweaked with this idea, and you've you've tried it out a little bit. What's the response been like from parents when you take this approach, rather than just do these 10 things?

Christen Clark (15:05)

Yeah, well, I think it's like anyone like with our children when we're encouraging them to do things or we're speaking life over them and we're giving them that motivates them. Like when I'm when my son's playing soccer and I'm yelling, you've got this, you've got this, you know what to do. You know, like follow through whatever I'm telling him that instead of pay attention to, you know, like all the things we want to say, like, you know, like when my kids were

KIDMIN U Team (15:26)

You

Christen Clark (15:29)

really little like they would there was like sand piles in the middle of the soccer field because it was like the church soccer field. And they would just be like playing with sand in the middle of the game and we're like stop playing with the sand, you know, so it's instead of like giving them all that corrective stuff, just to kind of remind them, you know how to do this, you're okay, you can handle this, you're ready for this and just that encouragement to get through it, that positive reinforcement, I think is is what

KIDMIN U Team (15:40)

Ha ha ha.

Christen Clark (15:56)

parents need to is they need to be reminded, you know what to do. You have enough theological training ⁓ and you have the Holy Spirit and you don't need to have a biblical degree from anywhere for you to be able to teach your kids about the Bible and to teach your kids what you believe. You can share your testimony with your children. You can pray with your children. You have everything you need for life and godliness. And so when God gives us his word and we are able to share it, that's enough. We don't have to

have all these like PhDs and all these different trainings in order to just to be the parents that God called us to be. And so I just, think we need to keep reminding parents of their job. And I think that's, you know, that's okay for us to put that on them and to help them realize what they're supposed to be doing.

KIDMIN U Team (16:43)

Yeah, I think so too.

I think for a lot of parents, there's probably this feeling of being overwhelmed and kind of like what you said is like, I am not enough this or I don't know enough that, you know, there's probably some doubt or insecurity inside each one of us that holds us back from being the parent that maybe we even already know that we're supposed to be, but we just don't feel like we have what it takes. And so I wonder, what does it look like to get really practical on this? Because it's one thing to say that it's another to maybe help them take their first few steps

and then discover that it is easier than they think. It doesn't have to be as complicated as we think. How do you help parents take those first few baby steps to discover that?

Christen Clark (17:24)

think it's okay. I think it's good to say to your kids, I don't know, but let's find out together. You know, when your kids ask you questions or when your kids are trying to figure things out, I don't know. You're right. It's hard. I don't know how to navigate this. Let's find out together. We have the blessing of the internet that we can search and we can look and we have got thousands of books at our hand.

⁓ that we can get to that we can learn about these different things. And so we can walk through this together with our children and that's okay. So I think really helping the parents to see, just start from where you are. Like don't try to be something else before you start, go ahead and start and let your kids walk through this with you. So whether the only thing you know how to do is say John 3 16 and pray.

start there and then start diving into those things together with your kids and growing and learning. they're in a a wanna or some Bible verse memory challenge, memorize the scriptures with them, like help you help the parents to see they can participate in some of this stuff ⁓ and just go alongside their kids so they don't have to achieve anything before they get started.

KIDMIN U Team (18:33)

Yeah.

I love it. Okay. If I know this wasn't a question that I threw to you beforehand, so I'm putting you on the spot here. But if you were to think about some healthy rhythms for families, you know, the things that become habits in your home of how you talk about Jesus, how you incorporate faith in the way that you parents, the way that you operate as a family. What are some of those things that you think would be really great to implement that maybe we as ministry leaders could say, okay, great. Here's the three or four things were like, if all

Christen Clark (18:40)

Okay.

KIDMIN U Team (19:03)

All I do is teach families how to do these three things or four things or whatever. This is a really good start. As I talk about that, what comes to mind that might be accessible, practical for an everyday family?

Christen Clark (19:17)

⁓ Well, let's get super practical. Okay, first of all, go to church. They need to be in church. Like if they're missing community, if they don't know what to do, if they're lonely, if they feel isolated, if they need encouragement, all of those things can be fulfilled at church. And so teaching these families to stay faithful to come to church, even when you don't want to, even when you don't feel like it, and then to let your kids see that. Let your kids see you say,

KIDMIN U Team (19:22)

You

Christen Clark (19:45)

I know we are all tired and we all have things going on and we all are busy, but we are a family that goes to church and you make that a priority in your family. I think that's a huge way to get started and really takes a lot of pressure off because you're not having to be all and do all because you're bringing your family into a community of the body of Christ and the body of Christ, everyone is not capable of all things. That's why we all have spiritual gifts that are different because everyone has different things they're good at.

and it feeds into the body of Christ. So teaching our families, that's so important that they're there. If they miss a Sunday, reach out to them. We missed you. We need you here. Let them know that they're needed and they're wanted to be at church. That's one. ⁓ The other thing I always encourage parents to start with is just listen to worship music or Christian music in the car. Turn on Christian radio or turn on your Spotify playlist on worship, whatever. ⁓

But get that music playing in the background. It's sinking into everyone's subconscious. It's filled with scripture. It's filled with encouragement. And it's just playing no matter what. So if you have other music you like to listen to, that's fine. But when your kids are in the car, turn on Christian music. You don't have to talk about it. You don't have to ask them what they think, or if they like the song or not, whatever, turn it on. Because you're just adding scripture to your day. You're adding biblical truth to your day without even trying.

⁓ The other thing I would say is to find ways for your family to serve more than once a year. So whether that is if you're a ministry leader and you're providing opportunities, make sure that your opportunities are not only happening around the holidays. I know there's lots of things going on for Operation Christmas Child and maybe you're doing some things for, you know, buying Christmas presents for Christmas, what is it, the tree angel thing for prison ministry or...

KIDMIN U Team (21:38)

Hmm.

Christen Clark (21:39)

gathering

clothes or soup kitchen, all those things, and we do a lot of stuff around the holidays. That's great. Let's find three more opportunities every season that we can do something in the community and give parents and families the opportunity to serve together. Because when we serve together, then we really get to see what our spiritual gifts are. Then we really get to see how we are connected to the body. And that's such an easy way to jump in. If your church doesn't offer opportunities like big service projects,

encourage families to serve together on regular Sundays, like ⁓ at one of the churches I worked at, there were dads and their kids would be ushers with them once a month. And so there was kids up there handing out the bulletin and greeting people as they walked in. Kids can do that stuff, but if your whole family is serving together, I think that's going to make a big impact. So those would be the three I would encourage. Super practical, really easy to start, takes zero effort.

and then just lead up to there. Then like, okay, now that we're serving, now that we're doing this, you know, whenever, whenever we listen to Christian music in the car with my kids, sometimes I'll stop the song and I'll say, what do think that means? When he's talking about surrender, why is it important? And all I did was like, feed from the song that just came on. So I don't have to come up with anything. Or if the DJ on the Christian radio station is talking about a topic, I'll say, what do you guys think about that?

KIDMIN U Team (22:46)

Hmm.

Christen Clark (23:01)

And then it starts a conversation where we can talk about the Lord or talk about serving or talk about gratitude or whatever. So just really easy ways to jump into these conversations and really help families connect with each other.

KIDMIN U Team (23:13)

Okay, what I love about that is that even more than the fact that there are three good ideas, they're actually backed by data. And I love when things are actually like proven to be true. There's a book, I think it was by Lifeway, it was Nothing Less. I think that book. Have you ever read that one? Okay, I was thinking about that all throughout what you're sharing because the three things that you brought up were at the top of the list. And for those who aren't familiar, it's a really great book. What they did is they tried to...

Christen Clark (23:29)

Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah.

KIDMIN U Team (23:44)

determine what are the things that we can do with our kids today that actually have an impact on them keeping their faith over time. The whole idea was how do we help build a faith that lasts not one that kind of withers away once they get into high school or college or become an adult. And so they looked at all of these things and there were a few things that were like high impact, medium impact, and then some things that were good but lower impact. And even simple stuff like having Christian music on in the car.

was really high on the list. Going to church on a regular basis was high on the list. Especially serving was one of those things that was really high. And I always took that into my own ministries because I'm like, what can we do for families? Because if serving together has a big impact on them keeping their faith over time, then let's figure out ways to do that. And I remember when it was years ago, like so long ago, I did an internship at Willow Creek for a summer and

They at the time, I don't know if they still do this, but they had this really big seed packing event. It was their outreach thing. They do it once a year and people could sign up for like a one hour slot where you just, basically put seeds in a little packet and you're going to send it off to a community so that they could help like grow food and nourishing things in their community. Kids can do that. And so there are kids all over whole families would serve like in the time slot together. It was so fun. They'd play music. People were talking.

Christen Clark (25:03)

Yeah.

KIDMIN U Team (25:12)

It's also a really easy task so you can actually get to know each other while you're doing it. You don't have to be like so locked in on it. And I was like, wow, the hidden power in doing something simple like this. We're showing our kids that this is how we build up the body of Christ. This is how we serve the kingdom of God. This is what's important to us. That lingers with kids. They remember that. And what I love about the first thing that you started with too of attending, I think sometimes parents think,

Christen Clark (25:18)

Right.

Right.

KIDMIN U Team (25:41)

of all the things I'm not doing yet that I've got to do. And there's power in reminding them, Hey, you're already checking the first box. You're already doing it. You're already on the right track. And also just like acknowledging and affirming, keep doing this. You're on the right track. Like you're doing all this stuff. Because again, when kids know that this is a part of our family rhythm, like it's non-negotiable, we do church on Sundays. ⁓ that changes things. I mean, how have you seen that in your own?

Christen Clark (25:44)

Right.

Yeah.

KIDMIN U Team (26:10)

I mean, I imagine like these are things you've probably put into play as well.

Christen Clark (26:14)

Yeah, I remember one of the first Sundays when I had not, I was not working at the church anymore and ⁓ my kids were like, can we just take a few weeks off and just not? And I'm like,

KIDMIN U Team (26:25)

Yeah.

Christen Clark (26:28)

you know that would be really easy because we did a lot and we committed a lot. My kids were really good staff kids like they knew where all the snacks were hidden in all the secret closets you know and now we're attending this new church and I said you know what we are a family that goes to church so that's what we're gonna do even even though we don't want to we really deserve we totally deserve a break but we're gonna go so ⁓

KIDMIN U Team (26:38)

Ha

Christen Clark (26:52)

I think it's really practical. And then my kids know so many songs and they can sing them and they can, yeah, like we listen to Christian music all the time. In fact, ⁓ some of my kids have friends that are not Christian. not, they have a different religion. And when they ride in our car, we've got Caleb playing and I won't apologize for that. Like that's who we are. So ⁓ it's just one of those things like we just do it and it's just part of who we are and it's easy. Now I will say,

I have to admit something, we have never had a consistent family devotional ⁓ thing. Like, I love families that do that. I wish my family could do that. We're so crazy busy. ⁓ And we are not faith. I've got so many great family devotional books that I could recommend. And we've read them in different time slots, but we are not faithful to do a family devotion. But we are faithful to go to church. We are faithful to listen to Christian music and

KIDMIN U Team (27:33)

you

Christen Clark (27:48)

⁓ One of the biggest things I think for me was recognizing that if I am doing my devotions, if I'm spending my time with the Lord in His Word and then just sharing what I'm learning, that's just as impactful as sitting down for an intentional Bible study, family, weekly, daily, whatever. So I just encourage anyone listening, especially people in ministry, because I felt like such a fraud.

I'm in ministry, I should be doing all the things, but sometimes I don't. Sometimes we don't get to it. Sometimes we're great if we just pray together. so sharing the things that I'm learning or the things that God's teaching me and letting my kids see that I'm faithful to study God's Word, that's going to make a big impact to you.

KIDMIN U Team (28:33)

Yeah, I appreciate that you're willing to share that too, because I think that's most of us. I think most parents would say, yeah, it's hard to have a regular rhythm of doing this stuff. and I think

What I love about this whole conversation is we're talking about how to live as a family. Like what is our normal rhythm? We're not talking about, I've got to check this box, then this box, then this is our daily like task list. It's great if you do those things, like highly recommend. If you have time and it fits within your rhythm to do a regular family devotion, obviously that's amazing. We all look up to you. We admire you. You know, I just have a baby right now. So like, I know that this is coming my way at some point, you know, we do story.

Christen Clark (28:52)

Mm-hmm.

Teach us your ways.

KIDMIN U Team (29:16)

time before bed and there are Christian storybooks that we read to her. But it's going to get harder when she's older and we have a second on the way and as we build our family, like it's not easy to have that rhythm. But what's more important, I think, rather than the one-off things is the way you're living your life. Like your kids are watching how you make decisions, how we spend our time. Like they see that. And if everything we do is baked into this idea of us followers of Jesus, like that's really at the root of everything.

I think that has a way bigger impact than just one off devotions because you could easily see the reverse of that where it's like, hey, hold on. We do devotions, but no other part of our lives reflect reflects Jesus. Like that could actually blow up in your face if the rest of your life doesn't reflect those things. So I would say you're already doing the most important thing. Everything else is kind of like, cool, we're just boosting that.

Christen Clark (30:09)

Mm-hmm.

KIDMIN U Team (30:12)

We're boosting this idea of what our kids already know, which is that Christ is at the center of everything we do, which I think is incredible. Your kids notice that. I'm sure they do.

Christen Clark (30:21)

Yeah.

Yeah, I think so. And I will say, you know, I have a lot of because I have a podcast, I have a lot of books and things like that, that people have given to me to read a review or look over and I love it. I'm like, I love this and I get all these books. It's so great. And I've got some great. No, but I have some great devotionals and you know where I keep them and I don't mean to be crass, but I keep them in the bathrooms because where do you have to sit for a while?

KIDMIN U Team (30:36)

I'm sure you've read all of them, right?

Christen Clark (30:49)

you could read for five or six minutes and there's a devotional so do it right there so we try to just make it intentional throughout the house not just in that one place or that one time so ⁓ god can speak to you anywhere and we want to teach our kids that

KIDMIN U Team (31:03)

Yeah, 100%.

Okay, I want to talk about some things that kids mystery leaders can do to support parents. And there are some things I think we're taught like maybe

send a monthly parent email or maybe like for the rock stars, they're doing it weekly. I don't know. ⁓ And maybe their Instagram or their Facebook is geared towards it. ⁓ What are the things that we should be paying attention to as it relates to us supporting parents? I know, yes, we're affirming their role. We talked about that. But on a really practical level, what are the tasks? What are the things? What are the deliverables, if you will, that we should be paying attention to that really help parents?

Christen Clark (31:43)

I mean, I think... ⁓

I think keeping it really basic and simple for parents to absorb. The parents want to know what you guys are talking about on Sunday morning. So when I ask, I ask my kids that every day when we get in the car at church, because I'm not in their classes or their small groups, what'd you guys talk about today? And so I'd love to know, you know, I hear their perspective and then I'm like interested to know what it really was, you know, sometimes it's like way off and sometimes I, you know, they have some information. ⁓ So I think that's important just to

to give parents that update to let them in on that. ⁓ And that gives them ways to have conversations with their kids, whether it's a baby or a middle schooler, you have the opportunity to share that with them in whatever way. ⁓ I think there's lots of things surrounding these heavy topics. We're talking a lot right now in culture about identity and about sexuality and about ⁓ anxiety and all these heavy topics.

and they're gonna start searching on, you know, chat GPT or on social media to try to find answers to those questions. So if you can help give them the resources that you recommend, that's gonna carry more weight than just something they search on Google. And so really having intentional resources available, whether that's podcasts, whether that's book lists, whether that's just kind of keep a running list of...

blogs, links that you like about certain things. And then that way, when someone asks you or when something comes up in the world, like, you know, we're devastated when we see these catastrophes on the news and, or we see, you know, heavy storms that wipe out a community or school shootings. Let's send, let's be intentional and pay attention and say, Hey, here's something just to think about as we're going through this and just something for you to read in case you were wondering, I think that's going to minister to them so much that we're paying attention to the things that they're concerned about. ⁓

And then also just giving them those seasonal reminders of like, you know, what Christmas is all about, what Easter is all about, what, you know, why it's so important to be in church, why it's so important to be faithful. If we could keep reminding of that stuff, like they're like, we've heard this great. Hear it again. That's okay. How many times do we have to hear something before it really clicks in? Like, so it's okay to repeat, to over communicate and just to give them that information in whatever means you can. And

⁓ One of the things that I love about podcasting is I'm not very good at reading emails. In fact, I'm terrible at it. I won't even tell you how many unread emails I have in my inbox. It's in the thousands ⁓ because I'm not good at reading emails. And so when a ministry leader or someone from church sends me an email, I do not always look at it. I'll look at the topic, I'll skim it really fast and then I'll go on. But if someone sends me a podcast and says, this is so good, you need to listen to it.

KIDMIN U Team (34:12)

You

Christen Clark (34:31)

I immediately push play because I'm driving or I'm doing chores or I'm working in different ways that I can work on graphics and doing some different things I'm doing for work while I'm listening to a podcast. there's so many ways that we can reach parents ⁓ and just recognize that they need this information. It's okay if they don't read your emails. I would still send them. I'm not saying not to send them because when they do need it, they're going to search for it and find it. But just making sure that you're reaching those parents and not.

always flooding their inbox but maybe being intentional about the things you are sharing.

KIDMIN U Team (35:05)

Yeah, and I think there's value to it your point of.

just doing different things, knowing that not everything is going to hit, you know, type one of parents, type two might be better on email, type three might be better if you send them a podcast, whatever, you're going to have a collection of different types of parents who respond to different types of things. And so it's still necessary, I think, to send those things. For some people, that's exactly what they're looking for. And sometimes if you don't send it, they'll let you know about it because they count on it, you know, but for other parents, they might need some

Christen Clark (35:12)

Mm.

KIDMIN U Team (35:38)

something

different. So it's okay to have multiple things you do. And it's also okay, I think, to be repetitive, right? I think people don't hear things the first time you say them, right? If anybody here is a parent, we know this with our own children, you know, like, if we could just say things once, and our kids would listen to it, and we'd never have to say it again, that would be a miracle. But all people are like this, you know, sometimes we don't really hear something.

Christen Clark (35:47)

Absolutely.

KIDMIN U Team (36:06)

until we hear it three times, five times, seven times. There's lots of different studies on that. And so...

The same idea where, you when you talk about these seasons of what does Christmas mean? What does Easter mean or whatever other big thing throughout the year? Yeah, there might be some families in your church who they already know that this is review for them. Okay, cool. You've already got it. Maybe we're either reinforcing the vision or there's value in bringing a new word to parents who don't already know that. So I think it's great. But I can tell people are listening, I can like feel it in my bones.

listening they're like okay but now you're adding to do lists on my plate i've got to do an email maybe i feel like i got to do a podcast i'm gonna have a mass texting system i need flyers i need social media whatever and it probably feels overwhelming ⁓ what do think is a great place to start like i mean obviously like if you can get to all those things at some point great but if you could pick one thing to just get it off the ground and start with what would it be

Christen Clark (37:09)

would say social media, ⁓ because that's where people are. That's where people are looking for information. That's where your congregation is looking for information about what's happening in the ministry, what you're doing, what your message is, who you are. And then also people outside of your congregation who are interested in your church or interested in what you guys are doing, they're looking in on that as well. So it really hits two different audiences. ⁓ So if you're not capable of doing an email list,

Posting something on social media is a great place to start. And the way that social media is set up now, they're linked together. So you do one post and you share it to the other platform. And you've hit two different audiences. So I think it's good to start there and just giving your parents information. ⁓ If you can do an email, even if it's a monthly email just about the content, create a really great template or AskChatGPT or Grok to create a really great template.

of newsletter and just fill in the blanks for each month. I know at the top, I'm always going to put what we're talking about for the month. I'm going to add some dates and important things that are coming up. And then I'm going to give them an encouraging paragraph or an encouraging or send them a link to a podcast or something they should listen to that goes along with something that is going on in your ministry or topic they're covering. just keep it as simple as possible. Do what you can, but start somewhere.

I think we get so overwhelmed that we get frozen up and or we say, ⁓ you know, I don't do social media like that's too much for me or I can't do all of that. Well, you could probably do it for your personal life. You could do it for your ministry and and don't blame ⁓ your apathy for trying new things and make that a spiritual thing. It's not.

you not willing to try new things and reach people where they are is not ⁓ spiritual. And so make sure that you're connecting with your families and where they are. I think that's important.

KIDMIN U Team (39:07)

Yeah.

on the monthly parent email thing. First of all, I think that rhythm is good to start. I think sometimes we overcommit and we're like, I'll do this thing every week. And then we just flame out because we find it's really hard. But I think a great starting point is monthly and we teach almost identical framework and kid menu because we try and keep it really, really simple. And shoot, that's why we named the podcast simple kids mystery. We like simple systems. ⁓ but we just have three things in our parent email that we teach. Number one is

Christen Clark (39:18)

Mm-hmm.

KIDMIN U Team (39:38)

Like, what are we teaching for the month? So we'll go week one, here's the story. And sometimes it's only one or two sentences. We don't need an essay on what it is. We just want them to know what are we teaching and why does it matter? The second thing we put on there is some sort of parent resource. This is where we think about value. So this could be a podcast, could be a blog, it could be a YouTube video, something that relates to the world of a parent or a family. Like you don't even have to create anything. Just pick something.

And then if you want, can kind of be like, ⁓ like have a little commentary on it, maybe a couple sentences like, Hey, I think this video is going to be really helpful for parents who are ⁓ currently facing this. I think you'll really love it. Take a look. Like it can be so simple. And then the third thing is just like odds and ends.

Like I have like literally a bucket where at the end, if there is a date that I want to put on their radar, if there's a link to sign up for something, if there's something we're doing at the church that I want them to know about, that's like the bucket and the catch all for everything. But if that's what you do, here's what we're teaching, here's some sort of parenting something for you to consume, and then here's a collection of all the stuff you might want to know.

That's so easy to do. In fact, the first part is probably already covered by your curriculum. You could copy and paste something from your curriculum in there.

Christen Clark (40:53)

Right.

Yeah, was about to say a lot of

curriculum gives you that information. You don't have to put it together.

KIDMIN U Team (41:02)

Yeah.

Yeah. So a lot of this, we're not even started from scratch. I think the part that some people might be hung up on might be like Instagram and Facebook and all that. And one trend I see with a lot of people is our kids ministry feeds end up becoming just 100 % information sharing.

Christen Clark (41:14)

Mm-hmm.

KIDMIN U Team (41:23)

and it's like a post like here's the event on this date, sign up here, whatever, and every post kind of sounds like that. How do you balance out that presence a little bit where you are sharing information, but there's more than just details?

Christen Clark (41:37)

Yeah, so I actually, ⁓ I'm teaching on this in January ⁓ and I've taught this a few times about how to just plan out your social media ⁓ because I think, like you said, we overcomplicate it and you don't want it to just be a bulletin board because like I said, it's not just your congregation that's looking at it, it's the people outside. So if they just see all you have is a list of events and flyers and graphics for things coming up, what they want to see is what's happening on Sunday mornings, what's happening

and your volunteer teams, what your teams look like. And so I created a brainstorming calendar so you can put together all the things. And so it's a monthly thing you can add to it. And it just helps you come up with some ideas and gives you like, here's what you need to do once a week. Here's what you need to do every couple of weeks. And then make sure that you're adding in those events. so like I said, if you took an hour and a half maybe and just brainstorm this out maybe with your team,

with some volunteers or just you just go to a coffee shop and kind of plug through this, ⁓ you'll have a full social media calendar for the month. And then it just kind of simplifies and streamlines it a little bit. And then you just create those things. It doesn't have to be hard. You don't have to have a video team that's creating and editing amazing reels and videos. It could just be a snapshot that you took of kids with their hands lifted during worship.

and you're just showing like this is what our ministry looks like. These are what our actual kids look like. This is not stock photo of a family walking in the building. This is a picture of the actual families that are coming into our place. And I think that's inviting and exciting for visitors that are checking out your content, but it's also encouraging for those families that are showing up because they're seeing like, oh, that's me. I made it to the feed for the ministry this week. So I think there's some really easy ways for you to.

to plan this out. I'm happy to send that to anybody who's interested if they want that calendar to kind of plan out their social media strategies.

KIDMIN U Team (43:37)

Yeah, I think it would be super helpful for a lot of people because I don't know that I've seen any good training on that, like just for kids ministries. I mean, all kinds of people are going to tell you all their ideas about social media, but I haven't seen that packaged just for a kids ministry leader. And I think that'll be really helpful because a lot of people I think are just wondering, like, where do I start? What should be on there? And also maybe seeing your plan and seeing that outline helps them see, okay, this isn't that complicated. In fact,

maybe there's a lot that I'm getting from my curriculum publisher that I can repurpose here or ⁓ My church has already has some assets that I can use and I can repurpose those here ⁓ Bottom line we don't have to do it on our own and there's way more resource available to us if we look and I am one of those guys who I Definitely thought for a long time that Instagram was not super important for a kid's ministry like you could do it But it wasn't going to be a difference maker until I worked

Christen Clark (44:12)

Absolutely.

Mm-hmm.

KIDMIN U Team (44:37)

at the most recent church that I was at. you know, most of my background is large church, whatever. This has been super fun because I've been working with a church plant and it's a totally different ⁓ ball game. And one of the things that I love about our team is we had a person on for a long time who is running like communications, social, whatever. And she was really good about like giving us stuff to post on our kids page too. And so every single Sunday we'd have like just great photos of what's happening at church. Like it's

not informational, like our Sunday posts are just look at what God's doing in our ministry. Look at the kids having fun. Look at the caring leaders who are invested in your kids. And we would do this rhythm like every week and I mean, we'd be growing. It was insane. I didn't think that the two were connected until that person took another job somewhere. And there's a little bit of transition and then we dropped off on some of that. And our attendance like actually started to plateau a little bit. Like we actually

Christen Clark (45:12)

All

KIDMIN U Team (45:36)

We actually saw like a lag effect on, okay, cool. I guess there actually is value in showing people in our community. Here's what church looks like. I didn't think that those shots actually mattered. I thought that the most strategic shots were the ones that were like, here's the event, sign up. That was the first time where I thought, wow, people actually just need to see a glimpse into our ministry. And that actually helps cast vision for why their family should be a part of what we're doing. Have you seen that? Like,

Christen Clark (45:45)

Yeah.

KIDMIN U Team (46:05)

impact kids mysteries at all. Maybe this is a one-off, but I was totally surprised by what I found.

Christen Clark (46:11)

Yeah, I mean, I think for me, like if I'm going to go to a new place, if it's a restaurant or whatever, I want to look at what's on social media. Like that's really the new search engine. And so if you're not intentional about what you're putting on social media, then when people come across your page and it's you haven't updated it since 2021 and it doesn't look like, like up to date or like anyone's paid attention to it, they're like, oh, they probably don't have that anymore versus like, oh, we just don't pay attention to it. So

It's where people are, you've got to be intentional about going there and finding them and connecting with them. It's the easiest way, it's free. It's an easy way for you to connect with your local community ⁓ and just to set up something so simple. I also think we have so many teens and young adults that are in our churches right now that don't feel like they belong. Maybe they're not a singer or they're not a technical person or they don't like serving with kids.

you know what they would love to do is to help you with your social media. So maybe there's somebody that even if they're just taking pictures, will you just take pictures with your phone and shoot them over to me and then you can like, you know, discern which are the best ones to put up or give them that, that license to kind of run it or to do it for a day and just, I think you'll see a big impact when you've got somebody that's really passionate about that, taking that off your hands, at least for the Sunday morning.

KIDMIN U Team (47:15)

Mm-hmm.

Christen Clark (47:37)

and during regular programming to help you so that's not one more thing you have to do, but finding those people that want to help, they'll be thrilled to do that.

KIDMIN U Team (47:45)

Yeah.

I actually think that's going to be a really easy yes. Like we probably think that's a big ask for a lot of people, but in my experience, those students actually come alive when you bring an opportunity like that. I mean, that's exactly what we did for a little while is yeah, we would have like our regular media team or social, whatever for the church. ⁓ but it's really hard to have somebody in place for each of these key ministries and manage what they got going on. And so, yeah, there are teenagers who were so excited and we were able to

Christen Clark (47:49)

Yeah.

KIDMIN U Team (48:16)

pair it with like, hey, you can learn from our like, staff team, like you can go, like actually get trained with them. And so there's a little bit of a collaboration between me as the kids ministry guy, and then the people who are actually professionals in media and photo and whatever. So to them, it was like, hey, I get to have like a free masterclass and how to run social media and how to how to take great photos and, and all this stuff. And kids today are consumed with that. Now we can talk about whether that's a good thing or a bad thing.

Christen Clark (48:31)

Yeah.

KIDMIN U Team (48:46)

but it's a thing. And so why don't we leverage it for something helpful, something useful. And those students have done such a great job. And our phones now can take incredible shots as long as you kind of know like how to frame some stuff up and what to look for and all that stuff. Like you can teach students those things. And how many of those students would just normally be sitting on the sidelines on a Sunday morning. And now all of sudden you give them a job to do and they feel ownership in that. You can even make a team out of that.

Christen Clark (48:47)

and yeah.

Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

KIDMIN U Team (49:16)

doesn't have to be one person you could have multiple doing that. think I think that's a brilliant idea.

Christen Clark (49:21)

Yeah, for sure. And I think if we are wanting those kids to stay in church, then we need to let them know they belong and they have a purpose that they don't have to wait until they're an adult to start serving God. And so, yeah, like you said, I think they'll be knocking down the door trying to be on the social media team. So that might be a neat opportunity for a lot of people to jump in on.

KIDMIN U Team (49:43)

Yeah, I think so too. this isn't maybe the topic, but I do want to hit on that now that you bring it up is when I got started serving in kids ministry, was 15 years old.

And it was almost by accident. was a freshman in high school and our church was moving to a new facility on the other side of town that we'd been building for a few years. And we knew there were a bunch of families in this new community and we wanted to be ready for just like a wave of people checking out our church. And so all across our church, we just tried to cast a vision for serving and finding a place where you can contribute. so long story short, I ended up in kids ministry and I loved it. It was amazing. And as I

think

back about all of the friends I had in youth group who were so dialed in, like they came every Wednesday night, they went to camp every year, maybe they were on like a leadership team kind of deal within the youth group, whatever. Most of those people, like it's sad to say, don't go to church anymore. But the ones who did were people who served on a team outside of youth ministry in the church. So when they graduated from high school, and were kicked out of the youth group, and they had to find a different place, that's really hard. But if I

Christen Clark (50:47)

Mm-hmm.

KIDMIN U Team (50:54)

already had my team, like I already was serving in kids ministry, I already was a greeter, I already was helping with production. It is a great bridge where people feel like they don't have to start from scratch at the end. And so I just believe if there's any youth pastors watching or people who like have a hybrid role where you do kids and students. ⁓

Christen Clark (50:56)

Yeah.

KIDMIN U Team (51:15)

Listen, I know we want to get students serving in our youth ministry, but actually I think the best thing you can do is help them serve outside of it because data shows like that's going to be a game changer in helping them stay in your church after they graduate. I know it was my story and unfortunately I saw.

Like the sad part of that, like growing up and looking back, I'm like, man, what if we went all in on helping teenagers find a team somewhere in our church? Obviously the kids ministry would be great, but just somewhere so that their faith doesn't feel like it stops at graduation.

Christen Clark (51:45)

Yeah.

Absolutely. In fact, I'm working on writing a book about that, about how we have taken out this, the idea of the Holy Spirit, how the Holy Spirit works through different people within the body, like we talked about before. We all have a job, like we've all been given a spiritual gift or a purpose within the church as a function, whether that's a paid office or a volunteer position or whatever.

And we're not teaching that to kids. We're waiting until they become an adult or a college student to say, Hey, did you know that you have a spiritual gift? I mean, you've had it since you accepted Christ as your Savior and the Holy Spirit came into you. And now you can learn how to use that. And instead of waiting until they're older, we can start as kids and help teach these children and youth and middle schoolers that you have a purpose within the body right now. You're not the church of the future.

you're the church of right now and you can serve kids. Kids can help be greeters in their own ministry. Kids can go be friends to someone. They can help clean up. They can pray over the service. They can teach part of the lesson or read scripture. There's so many things that kids can do and can be involved in. And we don't need to wait to give this huge part of spiritual discipleship and spiritual development to people when they're a lot older. We need to start teaching kids that they have an opportunity to belong to the body of Christ.

right now. And so I agree with you, I think if we are intentional about helping kids to see they belong, they're not going to walk away. Like we've seen in churches I've worked out before where families would start coming back to church, they would leave, they grew up in the church, they would leave in high school, and then they would come back when they started having kids. So we missed a whole 10-15 years with that person, because they didn't feel like they were they belonged anywhere except for

bringing their kids to church. That's so sad. We've got to help these young adults and these people to realize they already belong.

KIDMIN U Team (53:42)

First of all, I think that book is going to sell like hotcakes and whenever it does come out, we'll have to have you back on so we can we can help you promote it. OK, well, I'd love to maybe spend a few minutes talking on them. And and this is.

Christen Clark (53:45)

Yeah.

KIDMIN U Team (53:57)

near and dear to my heart because I feel like I lived in this reality for a little while. But there might be some young leaders who are listening to this who aren't parents yet. ⁓ Whether they're married or not, they just don't have kids yet. And so this idea of pastoring parents actually feels kind of daunting. Like maybe there's some insecurity, like, well, I'm not a parent, so how can I possibly try and coach or minister or support people who are? What would you say to young leaders who know

that's a part of their job but they feel really insecure about doing it because they themselves aren't parents yet.

Christen Clark (54:33)

Yeah, I think this is a great question because there's a lot of young leaders that are out there that are like this. And we've all seen it handled in the wrong way, which is let me tell you what I would never do to my kids. And then you have kids and you're like, yeah, I probably would do that. So we don't want to do that. I think the first thing is to be a really great listener. ⁓ You don't have all the answers. And I think it's good to approach it that way to say, I don't know what the answer is. I don't know what parents are facing.

KIDMIN U Team (54:44)

You

Christen Clark (55:02)

I'd love to hear more about that. And so when a parent comes to you about something like you did this, tell me more about why that bothers you. Tell me why you're concerned about that. I'd love to hear about that. I think if you say those words to someone, to a parent, even if you are 19 years old, they're gonna pay attention and listen to you. ⁓ The other thing I would do is to invite some parents into the conversation before you make big decisions. So if you're making a big decision about an event or about

switching your curriculum or whatever, invite some parents into that conversation and let them know, I want to be really intentional about this because I don't have kids and I want this to be something that is going to matter. I think those parents are going to be on your team for life. They're not going to question you ⁓ because they know that they have a voice within what you're doing. Now, it doesn't mean you have to listen to every single parent that tells you or gives you a complaint, but if you're really allowing them to have that space to talk to you,

they're going to have more respect for you. ⁓ So even if they need to come in guns blazing, I've had that many times where like, you don't need to do this and you did this. And I just, you just have to take it sometimes and say, thank you for sharing that with me. ⁓ Don't talk to me like that, but thank you for sharing that with me. And I'm just really being intentional about letting them know they're allowed to speak with you and they're allowed to approach you. ⁓ So even if you put together like a parent council, I think this is a really good idea. did the last church I was at.

KIDMIN U Team (56:14)

Ha ha ha.

Christen Clark (56:27)

is we invited some parents and some volunteers to be a part of this council. And it was really they met like twice a year. It was just like a lunch after Sunday and just said, here's what we're thinking about for the next six months. What do you guys think? We need some help recruiting some volunteers. Can you help with that? Yes. So you have this group of people now that's on your side. They're invested in the ministry and they're going to be more passionate about serving. ⁓ So that that would be what I would suggest. And then

you know, I'm a I'm a ministry coach. And one of the things I told one of my, what would that be? Cochise? What would I call my student? don't know. I don't know. I don't know what I'm the coach. They're the I don't know. Anyway, player is I said, I said, write this down at the top of all of your to do list. I'm the boss. ⁓ And I wanted her to write that down, because I wanted her to recognize that God had called her

KIDMIN U Team (57:02)

Trainees? I don't know.

Student? I don't know. Yeah.

Christen Clark (57:22)

to be in that position for such a time as this, that she had the full authority of the church who had hired her. She had the full authority of her position to be able to make decisions and speak life into her ministry. And so even though she might be young, even though she might not have kids, even though that guy just came in from whatever, you are the boss, you have been given this position and it's a holy and sacred calling and it's beautiful and it's wonderful.

but you're allowed to put your foot down. You're allowed to be the expert about what God is doing, about what the church is asking you to do. And ⁓ so it doesn't mean you get steamrolled. You still have to recognize, like Mufasa said, remember who you are, remember what your job is, and then allow those parents to be able to speak into that. I think that's gonna make a big impact.

KIDMIN U Team (58:10)

Yeah, I think there is like this, like internal bogeyman for for young leaders that they just think that if they try and do anything for parents without having been a parent yet, that they'll be like laughed in their face or people will just look down on them because they're young. And what I've learned is that that is way more internal than it is external. Like it always was a bigger deal to me than it was to the people around me. And this isn't even just talking about

Christen Clark (58:17)

Mm-hmm.

Absolutely.

KIDMIN U Team (58:39)

talking to parents before I was a parent. But you know, for most of my career, I mean, I was a kids pastor from when I was 24. And so there was a long time where I felt like I was the youngest person in a lot of rooms that I was in. And I had to get comfortable with that, you know, parenting and that sort of stuff was just one part of it. But I had to learn that it's OK for me to kind of go there and try and help and support as long as I'm humble about it. Like you were talking about.

Christen Clark (58:58)

Mm-hmm.

KIDMIN U Team (59:08)

If I come in trying to be an expert in something I'm not an expert in, ⁓ yeah, you will get some strong responses. People will not like that. They'll get mad at you. You'll turn people off. And that's where humility comes into play. But I just decided, okay, where can I be an expert where I actually am an expert? And so I would just say, hey, listen, I don't have kids. There's a lot that I don't understand. you know, ⁓ but

Christen Clark (59:08)

Yeah.

KIDMIN U Team (59:34)

The one thing I do know is kids. know how they grow. I know how they learn. And so what I would love is to be a resource to you. You know your kids and I know how kids grow and how they learn. What would happen if we just worked together? How can I be an asset to you? And people appreciated that because I wasn't trying to say that I know better how to parent their kids. First of all, even when I have kids, I would never say that to them because every parent is different. Every family is different. ⁓

Christen Clark (59:38)

Mm-hmm.

Right.

KIDMIN U Team (1:00:02)

But just learning like, hey, it's actually okay to do that. I've just got to get comfortable internally, having those type of conversations. And then the other thing I would say too is, ⁓ I think I just realized that there are things that normally would be part of a kid's pastor's job. Like, hey, do a parenting night or a training for parents, like things like that. And I put that off for years because it's like, well, I'm not a dad yet. Like what?

Christen Clark (1:00:07)

Yeah.

KIDMIN U Team (1:00:29)

I don't want to be that guy who doesn't have kids, but let me tell you everything you need to know about being a parent. I didn't want to go down that path until one day it just, I don't know what the shift was, but it just clicked. was like, listen, it's my job to make sure it happens, whether it's me leading it or not. That's such a small idea, but for some reason that just hadn't clicked until years in. And so I would just invite people in and when we would do a parenting thing,

Christen Clark (1:00:33)

Yeah.

Yeah.

KIDMIN U Team (1:00:56)

I would just be the host, I'd be an MC. I wouldn't be the expert talking in the mic, I'd bring experts with me and I'd let them do the talking. But for young leaders out there, maybe lead into that. It's your job to make sure it happens. And if you're avoiding it right now, I would lovingly encourage you to like, confront that part, confront that doubt inside of you and just acknowledge it and say, okay, even though I'm afraid, it's my job to do things for parents, but maybe I can lean into the people around me.

pastors on staff, like I guarantee you, somebody on your staff team could be the person who like speaks at that parenting thing. Bring your pastor in, like that's the easy answer. Bring your pastor in to talk about leading families. ⁓ But it is our job and we can't avoid it forever. I wanna give you the final word on that.

Christen Clark (1:01:43)

Right. And

even if you have like a really great volunteer on your team, do a panel where you invite people and that way you get to still speak into it, but you're also inviting other voices, you know, those parents that have kids that are already have moved on and those really awesome grandparents that still serve in your ministry and then bring a student up there to talk about what their experience was like going through it. You have all these perspectives, so it doesn't have to just come from every parenting expert either. It can just be from

different people in different stages of life. yeah, we're all ⁓ capable of opening that up. think that's important.

KIDMIN U Team (1:02:19)

I love it. Okay, so I want to end our time with a little bit of Q &A. We've got a few people who've been watching this live recording. So shout out to them. We're glad that they're here. Now is the time where if you want to throw your questions in the chat and actually ask Kristen, some of these things, I'm to give you a minute to throw those in. We'll try and get through as many as we can. In the meantime, I've got a few people in our Kidman U community who

already gave me a couple things that they wanted to ask about. One of them I think we sort of hit on but I'll ask you again, they're asking parent emails, how often should I do it? What should go inside of it? Any other thoughts that you would add on top of what we already covered?

Christen Clark (1:03:00)

⁓ I would just say start small. ⁓ If it's once a week or once a month, like don't try to overdo it. ⁓ And really I would just suggest creating a template that works so well for me because I'm not that organized person. So just having that thing where you can just plug it in really simple and send it off. You're doing that, do that work ahead of time. And then it doesn't feel like such a chore when you have to get it out. But I would say monthly or weekly is a really good place to be.

KIDMIN U Team (1:03:28)

Yeah, okay, this is maybe not what they asked, but for those who care about the details, what would you use to send it? Is there a platform that you really like for sending emails?

Christen Clark (1:03:38)

⁓ Right now I'm using Mailer Lite. I've used MailChimp. I've also just used Outlook and just pulled a bunch of emails from an Excel spreadsheet and dropped them in. So you don't have to use a platform. Those platforms are great because it's easier to create those templates. And then you can just say, use last template and just pull that same email up and then just plug in the new information. So ⁓ I guess those would be the ones I recommend.

KIDMIN U Team (1:03:50)

Ha ha ha.

Yeah. Okay. I want you to confirm something for me, cause I could just be really weird on this. I'm a big fan of plain text emails. I know everybody wants to have like a lot of pictures and you know, animated things and make it super polished. But actually when I look at the things that I subscribe to that I actually read, it's the times where they actually strip it down. It's just plain text, but it's the words is the insight that they're sharing that I subscribe for.

Christen Clark (1:04:17)

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

KIDMIN U Team (1:04:32)

Is that just me?

Have you noticed any of that? Maybe I'm crazy.

Christen Clark (1:04:35)

Yeah, I mean I think people are scaling back like I used to see lots of newsletters that had like way more You know, it was more like the print newsletters. They had lots of graphics and different things and it's just not necessary I think it's good if you include your you know your logo and maybe ⁓ I think it's also good to put your picture on there because some people don't especially if you have a bigger church or you have a lot of different people and they've been greeted by 12 different people you're they're not sitting in all their kids services so be like, ⁓ that's the guy

that's the children's pastor. I think that would be a good thing to include. But yeah, I don't think you have to go overboard with it.

KIDMIN U Team (1:05:12)

Yeah, I think that's a great idea, by the way, and I hadn't really considered that, but you're right. A lot of churches, we know who the lead pastor is. We know who the worship pastor is. We know those random people who host, you know, or MC on stage, but the one person who's like usually pretty anonymous is the kids pastor because they're too busy working and they're too busy like getting stuff done. And they're usually not as visible maybe as some other roles. And so even though you think, I'm obviously here.

Christen Clark (1:05:26)

Yeah.

Yeah.

KIDMIN U Team (1:05:41)

Like obviously, you know, it's clear that I'm the pastor when you walk in. It's not always clear. And so I love the thought of you just have your picture at the end as part of your signature, maybe or something. And even I wonder what it would look like if you cued families to come and talk to you. Obviously, you're going to always be proactive. You're going to be looking for them. But what if that was kind of the way you signed off, like every email is like, hey, I would love to connect with you and hear how I can support you. Make sure next time you're at church like

Christen Clark (1:05:58)

Yeah.

KIDMIN U Team (1:06:09)

just stop me and say hello, I'd love to meet you and your kids. You know, something like that is very warm. Like now you're teaching them, hey, I want you to come talk to me. I want to be approachable. I love it. Okay, next question we had was on ⁓ parenting events. What have you seen that's really worked when it comes to hosting events for parents?

Christen Clark (1:06:12)

Yeah.

Well, I'm from the Baptist persuasion that if you feed them, they will come. And so I don't like going to events that don't have food. So I don't want to invite anyone to an event that doesn't have food. ⁓ And it's so easy to do fun stuff like that. So I would say, definitely make it a meal or have a snack or whatever. It's really simple. ⁓ I think really like we were talking about before, like paying attention to what's happening in the world. ⁓ I know there's lots of things you might be passionate about that you want to share with your

KIDMIN U Team (1:06:35)

Hahaha.

Christen Clark (1:07:01)

families but if you can bring that along with like other things that people are interested in like you know whenever you do a topic a family or parenting night about technology or about anxiety you're gonna have so many people show up from outside of your church and so it's a great outreach to actually pay attention to what's going on and what people are interested in.

⁓ So just really looking at those topics, it doesn't have to be a big name. You don't have to bring in a huge person that has a bunch of books or whatever. ⁓ If you want to bring in someone that has really great podcasts, I'm definitely down for that. ⁓ But think about how you can connect with your community and what is it that parents really need. I think that's going to go further than trying to do the latest and the greatest.

KIDMIN U Team (1:07:36)

Ha ha.

Yeah, for sure. And I think it is one of those weird dynamics where I don't know if parents like recognize the names that are a big deal in a certain space. You know, like we know that Kristen Clarke is a really big deal. We know that there are these other authors who are really big deal. But for a parent who's not as maybe plugged into the things that we are. Yeah, it's different, you know, and I actually it's so weird. I've brought in guests before.

Christen Clark (1:07:58)

Yeah.

KIDMIN U Team (1:08:15)

And sometimes the best results have ever gotten or when I can get our lead pastor to come and like be featured or be the main voice at a certain thing because they already know them. They already care about what they have to say and their perspective on things. And it's also like a little bit of badge value too when your pastor is like supporting what you're doing. The fact that he's just there, whether he's talking or not ⁓ is really valuable. however you do it, whether you have a budget to bring in

Christen Clark (1:08:19)

Mm-hmm.

Right.

Yeah.

KIDMIN U Team (1:08:42)

an amazing speaker like Kristen, or you've got zero budget and you're just like trying to figure it out. There's something for everybody. ⁓ But yeah, I think you got to feed them. I wonder too, you mentioned having a council of parents. That to me feels like a great way to figure out what you should talk about at these events. Just ask them, hey, what do you think is pressing for families? You don't have to come up with it alone. I mean, shoot, you could go on Instagram on your page and be like, hey, we're gonna be doing.

Christen Clark (1:09:02)

Absolutely.

KIDMIN U Team (1:09:11)

a spring parenting event. ⁓ Maybe you have one those interactive things where you're like, hey, what are the topics that matter to you? What should we talk about? And then just pay attention to what people say. But people will tell you what they want to know. But I think there's a danger, like you were saying, in just assuming that we know what the most valuable thing is. All we gotta do is ask. If you've got a council in place, then you're good.

Christen Clark (1:09:35)

Yeah, you don't have to come up with any ideas. Just let them do it.

KIDMIN U Team (1:09:38)

Yeah.

Okay. I think we're coming up on time, but this has been incredible. Kristin, I really appreciate you having you on. If people want to get to know more about you and what you're doing and the cool things that you're putting out, where should they go?

Christen Clark (1:09:53)

So they can head over to my website, kristinclark.org, and I've got some great resources. I'm about to launch a podcasting with purpose webinar actually next week. So if you're interested in starting a podcast, even if it's for your ministry, you just wanna send, that's your newsletter, do a podcast newsletter. This would be a great way for you to learn about how to do that. And so I'm doing that.

I also have one that I created last year about crowd control. So how to work with large groups, classroom management, skills, things like that. So that's all my resources page at KristenClark.org. ⁓ Yeah, and then I'd love for you to listen to the podcasts, Seven Minute Devotions ⁓ for Busy Parents and also the Collide Kids podcast are both wherever you get your podcasts and you can follow us on social media as well.

KIDMIN U Team (1:10:40)

I love it. That's incredible. Kristen, thank you for coming on. For all the people who've been tuning into this, thank you for showing up and supporting this show. Until then, we'll see you next time.